"Anonymous" !

Did you ever wish that words didn't have the power that they have? Have you ever just sat and read something that just made you gasp and hurt seconds after you came to the period at the end?

I logged onto my blog to once again share with all of you the events of my day. I was thinking of sharing the ticket that the cop with the big rim hat seemed to think I deserved yesterday, but just as I was thinking of the words I wanted to say; I decided to browse the words that all of you had to say instead.

I saw them there post after post the words that told me how inspiring and how much my writing has affected all of you with your names posted below your comments so that I would know that you had stopped by. I read each and every one and finally made my way to the top to a post that didn't want me to identify them at all. "Anonymous" was the name of our mysterious visitor that made their way around my words that I'd taken the time out of my day to share or sometimes just to download to all of you. I read the words aloud of our new visitor "I finally made my way to your blog, and I have to say that I have never seen the likes of such a self centered, self absorbed and selfish person that to tell you the truth inspires no one but the only person she cares about, herself. I recommend psychiatric help"."

Finally, and I assure you not a moment too soon, the period let me know that it was time to stop reading. I did what I usually do when something shocks me and hurts the so easily hurt feelings that I wish weren't so fragile; I sat there and I cried...Then I thought of every person that I know and wondered who would of wrote such terrible words? Finally, when I couldn't come up with an answer; I cried some more. I'm certain that a lot of the tears that I allowed for these silly words were just the added stress of the $100 dollar ticket that I'd gotten only hours before. However, I was certain that some of the water that continued to fall from my eyes was for my unknown friend, "anonymous".

I thought a lot about the words as I tried to fall asleep last night. It's another trait about myself that doesn't thrill me; I over-think every emotional second of my life. I used to beat myself up about it a lot, but as I've gotten older; I have become quite comftorable with blaming it on the fact that I am a woman. And no matter how many books college educated men may try to write about us; it is just impossible to completely figure out the emotional state of a "woman". So I finally came up with this answer to my "anonymous" commenter and I hope that "she" is able to read our follow-up blog.

And of course I am certain that "Mrs. Anonymous" is a she because who else would beg for us to listen to what they have to say but a woman? Especially since most of us know that a man doesn't take the time to talk to us when he is just a sofa away from us and will do anything for us not to talk to him so that he can finish watching whatever is on the tv in front of that sofa. So with what my keen mind figured out about "Mrs. Anonymous" , I came up with a message for her so that she will at least know that "I" have listened to what she has had to say.

"Mrs. Anonymous", I would just like to say thanks for stopping by and taking the time to leave a comment so that you can be heard on my blog much like the rest of my followers. "Self centered" is not a comment that I usually see lingering around in my inbox, but will definitely consider explaining why you might have gotten this impression of me from my blog. I am not sure if you workout yourself or the state of your physical fitness at all, since you are merely a "fan" without a name on my comment page; and yes, you are a fan, seeing how you took the time to write a paragraph just for me. Thanks for giving me some of the precious moments of your day.

I looked up "Self Centered" in Websters dictionary so that I could defend myself a bit more and this is what it said...Self Centered- Independent of outside force or influence, concerned with ones desires, needs or interests. After reading these words, I had to admit that a few of these applied to me. I am certain that the 22 plus times I pull myself up on a pull-up bar or the 60 minutes of cardio that I do 5 days a week are not because I am concerned by the influences of others. I am also certain that I am concerned with my needs and the needs of my body to be as fit as it can possibly be despite the sacrafices that I have to continuously make or the outside forces that I cannot always be a part of because of those sacrafices. So, if self-centered is what I have to be two hours a day to go beyond what the normal couch potato is willing to do, then I suppose you are correct.

The next word that you chose to describe me was "Self Absorbed" and the definition reads-absorbed in ones own thoughts, activities or interests. Hmmmm, I suppose, you probably got me here once again. My thoughts are amazing how they keep my mind running day after day, hour after hour. As a matter of fact, it is the reason that I write to all of you here; so that I can download them and get more sleep at night. So, with that said, I suppose you got me; I am quite into my own thoughts and activities, but it leads me to wonder just how I would look if I didn't partake in my two hour activity at the gym everyday. I hope you agree, that you can hardly fault me for that.

Finally, your last words to me were that I was selfish and needed psychiatric help. I didn't even go to the dictionary this time to defend myself against this one "Mrs. Anonymous". I will just simply end with this. Aren't we all selfish from time to time if were truly truthful with ourselves? And if you really stepped back and thought of the time that you took away from something really important in your life to leave such a shocking paragraph for me; wouldn't you have to admit that it was selfish to spend so much time typing a paragraph that would only hurt the feelings of a powerful writer? Your last words before the period that finally led me to stop reading were that I need to see a psychiatrist. I didn't even have to think about this one, "Mrs. Anonymous", and I'm sure you would agree. Don't we all? And wouldn't it be the best luxury in the world if we were all able to take the time out of our day and lay on a dam leather couch and just release all of our problems to a doctor that has nothing more to do with her day than listen? Now, that would be the life....but, unfortunately, "Mrs.Anonymous", I have to take my "Self-Centered" bum to the gym!