FitJgirl

I stumbled to the kitchen the same way most of us stumble on Monday mornings as we wonder who stold Saturday and Sunday away from us. I followed my feet as they led me to the coffee maker to brew my first cup of "black only" coffee while I skimmed the pages of the lives of my facebook junkies. I took my first sip, and as I wondered how it could possibly be fair that I chose to give up the cream and equal of previous mornings; I saw a post that made the lack of cream and sugar seem minimal. I stared at the blonde beauty in the blue rhinestone suit with the same heels that I have mastered a million quarter turns in. I read her post a few more times before it truly set in. "First in my class, in my very first show", I wanted to post right away how amazing and flawless she looked on the stage, reaping the rewards of her no yummies for 12 weeks diet; but something in me couldn't yet type the words.
I hated this part of me, the part that had that little inkling of jealousy for the first places that after 6 shows, I've yet to see. I've known that this part of me has existed for quite some time and please don't get me wrong; I have sought help through self-help books and prayers, many prayers. I decided to give myself two hours to decontaminate this demon that was living within me and then I would respond. An hour passed, and I picked up my trustworthy book and read a couple pages, and just so you know it's "Jealousy, the sin no one talks about" by RT Kendall. I read again how many times the author, RT Kendall had found himself in the same position and how he despised the part of him that couldn't just be happy for his colleages.
He even goes to add how he questioned when his friend claimed that the spirit of God was in their church because he couldn't understand why God had not come to "his" church. Yes friends, our author is a very well know minister. I felt like I was amongst good company and not such a wicked soul, but rather a repentful one. I, after all was seeking to rid myself of this pest that lived within me. It can be so painful for us to admit that We are jealous. However, jealousy goes far beyond the happenings of today, and dates back all the way to Cain and Abel. He goes on to explain how the Reverand Billy Graham has made more preachers jealous than you could count-not dozens, hundreds, or thousands, but hundreds of thousands. I began to forgive myself for my mishap and pat myself on the back for the guts to admit to such a thing and share it with all of you.
I made it to my car with my music attached to my arm, ready to rock me through two hours of a workout that may or may not lead me to a first place in 26 weeks. I grabbed my phone and my too pink gym bag and started to head to the place that I was most powerful. I thought of how great I felt on the other side of those doors as warriors watched me do twice as many pull-ups as themselves. I thought of the many times they'd walked up and told me as much and shook my hand. I thought of the pretty blonde in the blue rhinestone suit with the brightest of smiles for the trophy that she'd earned. I grabbed my phone and without an inkling of anything but pure joy from the very core of my now clean heart; I wrote a message right beside the picture that I'd viewed over my less than yummy coffee that morning. I simply wrote "A true, flawless beauty", and that she was my friends...and that trophy well deserved..and at that moment I knew that I meant every word and that the jealousy from the two hours before had moved on and had left my love everybody heart.
As I walked out the gym, I heard my phone ding and I read the message that awaited me. It was the blonde beauty in the blue rhinestone suit with words as beautiful as she was; Simply they read: "Thanks Jena, you are an inspiration to me. You lit a desire in me to push myself to the next level. You are an awesome woman and I hope we meet in person some day." I dried the awesome tears from my sweaty cardio cheek and felt a pang in my humbled heart, and I ran my fingers through my own blonde hair and smiled as I thought of the beauty that had sent those words to me; A woman that was much like myself, living life with a dream of being a champion in rhinestone heels. I smiled as I thought of the beauties that held my same dream and vowed to be more grateful to be in the company of such an amazing, less than ordinary group. Life is so good friends, don't let jealousy stop you from loving and rejoicing in it with the true beauties around you...